One is not the loneliest number

Sitting in church a while ago, I was looking around at all of the other single women in the congregation.  It hit me that there are a number of women in my ward who are only single at church, meaning they have a husband at home who chooses not to join them at church, whether he's a member or not.  That got me to thinking, would I rather be single, or married to someone who didn't support me in my beliefs?  What would it be like to attend church and be uplifted and strengthened by the Holy Ghost, and go home to someone who hasn't had that?  What would it be like if I was growing closer to God and my husband wasn't?  How does that impact your ability to grow together as a family?

And what about the sisters who come to church with their spouses, but are still practically speaking alone?  you can attend the same church without actually supporting each other.  you can make a show of supporting your spouse at church, then completely change once you leave the building.

Combine these thoughts with a couple of conversations with women who are now in happy second marriages following a less than positive first marriage.  Both of these women advised that it is better to be single than to be married to the wrong man.  I dated a guy once who was definitely a wrong man for me.  I'm sure he'll be great for someone, but even though he had many wonderful characteristics, our life plans and expectations were far too different, and I knew that if we ever got married, I would spend more time alone than I did as a single person, whether it be physically or emotionally.  Which is not what I am looking for in a husband.

And so I continue to be patient, preferring to be happily single than unhappily married. 

Nobody's perfect

Here's a (bad) shot of a card I got recently. (note the modesty towel to cover what his low rise underwear didn't) 

The punch line of the card is " with his mommy.  So close."  There's always something.  But it doesn't have to be a roadblock.  I mean really, maybe Trent is living with his mommy because she's sick and he's taking care of her.  He looks like the compassionate, helpful type, doesn't he?  Or maybe she can't afford the rent on her own and he's helping her out.  Just look for the positive.

Another Reason

I recently discovered another potential reason for getting married.  The lease on our office space expires in the next year or so, and we will be moving to a new building.  The new space is located in the same building as the Holt Renfrew store, which is a very high end, very expensive clothing store.  I was joking with one of the senior guys at work and asked if one of the conditions of the new lease was that we'd have to shop at Holt Renfrew once we moved to the new building.  He said, no, what you need to do is get a man, so when you go shopping there, there's someone at home who can look at the bills and be shocked and appalled at how much you spent and how little you got for it.  Implicit in his response is that the husband would also be paying the horrifically high bill.  While I've certainly thought about having a husband who earned a sufficient income that I could stay home and take care of the kids, it never would have occurred to me to get a husband so I can shop at Holt Renfrew.  I'm actually really good at being shocked and appalled at high prices all by myself, so I think I'll stick with the more basic reasons to get married - companionship, fulfilling the commandments, etc.